This Experience Sucks

I'm talking about this whole caring about politics thing.

It kind of blows.

Four years ago, I got semi-involved in politics when I collaborated with every other right-thinking human being in America and decided that four more years of President Bush was not acceptable. I only voted, but I voted the hell out of that ballot. Nobody cast their vote with the same panache and verve that I used.

And we still lost.

Before that election politics was a side issue for me, and since that election it's pretty much been the same. I keep abreast of major news, and I have opinions, but I haven't really cared too much. Truthfully, none of the people involved were important to me.

Y'all see where this is going.

Obama's change-championing and hope-hawking ended all that. That articulate and intelligent bastard sucked me in. His moving memoir, resounding rhetoric and dynamic demeanor eventually erased my apathy and got me started reading blogs and other crap about politics.

Shoot, even this blog is a result of his campaign. Seeing a black man as a viable presidential candidate actually inspired me to get my thoughts out into the world.

But, the problem with caring about stuff is that you open yourself up to pain. As many other people have noted, one of the main reasons black folks were slow to jump on the Obama bandwagon was because we didn't want get our hopes up only to have them ground into dust by the cracker of the world.

Black people, and this is coming from a brotha who has done extensive field studies, are some of the most cynical optimists in the world. We always hope for the best and expect the worst. Of course, this an understandable byproduct of living in a country where getting the shaft is a way of life, but that mindset still encourages self-defeating behavior. Many black people are prophets who regularly issues self-fulfilling negative prophecies about themselves and everyone else in their lives.

"You ain't gonna be shit."

"Ain't no good going to come of that."

"Why you even care, it ain't gonna make a difference."

"Now you know white folks is not gonna allow that to happen."

Negativity is a pathology in the black community, and it infects every economic and educational class..

But, Obama was starting to change some of that.

Just a little, he was encouraging some black folks to be willing to hope. With every primary or caucus win he was causing more black people to care, to get invested in America again.

For example, before Obama came around my father didn't know what channel CNN was on, let alone who the anchors were. Now he can debate random policy points about Obama's health care plan and his proposal to get us out of Iraq. This man calls me up randomly to discuss county vote totals and rattles off which groups are trending towards Obama. It's eerie.

Shoot, on Tuesday I was coming out of a store and a random black man blurted out to me "It looks like old boy is gonna take it."

Now I don't know about where y'all live, but in New Orleans, black men do not spark up random convos with each other unless a girl with fat ass walks by. Typically, we only exchange head nods, and you cannot make eye contact for more than three seconds without risking someone thinking you "booting up."

My initial reaction to this guy's comment was to say "Oh really?" while quickening my stride towards my truck.

But, imagine my surprise when this man started sharing the early vote totals from Vermont and dropping knowledge like "there are no black people in Vermont so that must mean Obama is doing good." You could hear the excitement in this cat's voice, his joy was palpable.

This recent setback ('cause that's all it is) for Obama has surely dampened the hope of some black folks and many of the them are probably wondering if it's worth getting mentally and emotionally invested in political campaigns. There were probably Wednesday morning quarterbacks across the country telling their friends and family that "they always knew the white folks wasn't going to let him win."

Eff them!!!

Seriously, I welcome this pain I'm feeling right now. See, my previous position as an uninvolved observer was unacceptable. The choices I make and the ones I avoid affect not only my life, but the lives of future generations. I will not abdicate my responsibility to be an informed, engaged member of this society just because I'm disillusioned. I will not allow the lies of Clinton and her surrogates to move forward unchallenged, I will not allow them to win.

And neither should you.