Men Are From Mars And Women Are From God Knows Where

So, I'm cruising the internet and I land on the New York Times.

I read a story there about the divorce of Christie Brinkley and Peter Cook, and about how their very public split has been discussed quite frequently in the rich enclave known as The Hamptons. Most folks there are familiar with the details of the case, although they all claim they haven't been paying that much attention.

Anyway, in the article, there are a couple paragraphs that discuss the different reactions to the case by men and women. Women seem to think that Cook, who had an affair with an 18-year old and spent thousands on internet porn, is a Grade-A scumbag with no redeeming qualities. Men wondered why his former wife had been married and divorced four times, and what that said about her. They also noted that marriage is hard.

I shared those graphs with a friend of mine, a woman, and it sparked a long debate between us about the differences between how men and women see the world and what that means for the concept of "till death do you part."

Yep, it was one of those convos.

I won't try to rehash all of the particulars, I wouldn't want to bore y'all. But, what we arrived at was this: Neither men nor women really understand how the other gender views the world, and most of us don't really care to be educated. Not only are we not interested in a gender education, most of us scoff at the idea that we're ignorant.

I told y'all it was one of those convos.

One of the conclusions my friend and I reached was that men view life in a linear, problem-solving, somewhat logical manner. Women view life in an illogical, emotional and whiny manner. Well, that's the conclusion I reached; if she disagrees she needs to get her own blog.

Patriarchy rules!

I'm joking. Actually, we agreed that women are the more emotional sex, that they are more concerned with empathy than solutions and that they tend to repeat themselves a lot when they are unhappy about something. Now, of course I thought that her description proved just how crazy women are, while she thought my description of men was based in a fantasy world that ignored the idiocy of the male homo sapiens.

We both wound up entrenched in our positions. While we admitted that each other's arguments had merit, neither of us was willing to cede any ground about what each sex needs to do to make the other gender happier. I thought women could be logical, she thought men could show more empathy. I thought women should focus on solutions, she thought men needed to stop thinking they had the answer to every problem. I figured that women should stop talking so much, she decided men needed to become better listeners.

Like I said, we ended up at an impasse.

The funny thing is, I tried to avoid discussing relationship issues with my friend because I knew we were going to end up at that impasse. I told her that while I don't condone infidelity, I understood why the men in the article didn't think Cook was Satan's spawn. I calmly let her know that until she actually got married, she wouldn't understand the pressures married people face. I suggested we discuss something else because men and women really can't talk about this issue.

But, she wouldn't allow it to happen. She insisted that men and woman can talk about these issues and solve them. She even said something like "Well, I guess this means you can't talk about black and white issues on your blog any more. After all, white people will never be black so they will never understand racism and you're just yelling for nothing."

That was a low blow.

And do you think she admitted after our extended conversation went nowhere that it was pointless to try to discuss certain issues because of gender viewpoints? Do you think she had the decency to say "Allen, you were right, I was wrong. Next time I'll defer to your infinite wisdom."

Nope, she just laughed and said that I just didn't get women.

Typical female.