Priority Pow-Wow

Everybody who is familiar with the intimate details of the Chris Brown/Rihanna brouhaha, please raise your hand right now?

Now, those of you who know as much about the collapse of that relationship as you do about President Obama's stimulus package, please raise your other hand.

Just so y'all know, I only have one hand up.

As the homie from Raw Dawg Buffalo website has pointed out on many occasions, I'm probably not the only person with one hand up.

I would be lying if I said I've spent the same amount of time discussing exactly where all that money is going, as I've spent discussing where Chris Brown's punches went. I've been involved in multiple arguments/discussions about domestic violence and this whole ordeal, and I haven't had one substantive discussion about how the stimulus will affect me.

Am I a loser?

Honestly, the Chris Brown stuff was more interesting to me. And while I won't say it's more important than the stimulus package, it's not the mindless drivel that some folks have said it is. After all, domestic violence is a real and serious issue, and we need to discuss the proper responses to violence if we as a society have any hope of seeing the next generation use them.

But, I still feel bad. I should be breaking down that stimulus package and judging Obama's performance. I need to know how this is going to help reverse the recession and put Americans to work. This is important for my present and future, Chris Brown is going to be all right.

But, I'll probably check Bossip before I read the New York Times tomorrow.

I'm weak.



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What You Talking 'Bout?

When I was a little kid, my mom put a poster on my wall that I've never forgotten. The poster read :"Great minds talk about ideas, mediocre minds talk about events and small minds talk about people."

My parents always pushed my brother and I to be leaders instead of followers. In addition, they had little patience when we made mistakes and blamed those mistakes on the actions of others. In their minds, we were responsible for our own thoughts and our own actions. Any attempts to shift responsibility were met with swift dismissal.

I remember the first time I got into a fight with someone because of a "Yo' momma" joke. In the black public schools I attended, the easiest way to start a fight without actually hitting somebody was to talk about their momma. If you didn't fight to defend your momma, everybody assumed you were a punk.

So, when a classmate made a crack about my mother, I knew what I had to do. I started swinging, we started fighting, and pretty soon I was in the principal's office explaining the nebulous code of honor that ruled the playground.

Unfortunately, my mom didn't seem to care about that code. As I explained to her just how vile an insult my classmate had directed at her, she asked me one simple question: "Does that little boy know me?"

Blew my mind.

After all, my classmate didn't know my mother from the tooth fairy. Who cares if he said she was so fat her belt size was "equator?" He had never even seen my mother and probably couldn't spell equator. His words had no power because he had no power over my mother. He couldn't make her fat, or dumb, or ugly. All he could do was talk.

My mom taught me an important lesson about letting people control me. She always said that if you let somebody push your buttons, they'll keep on pushing to watch you dance. Despite that old rhyme about sticks and stones, we all know words have the power to hurt. The difference is that when someone hits you with a stick, you have no choice in being hurt, but you do have a choice when it comes to ugly words.

There have been many days where I cried real tears about the words somebody said to me and how they made me feel. I'm sure most of y'all can relate to that. But, that pain taught me how to craft my words into weapons, and then life taught me when it was time to use that weapon. There was a time when I was much less careful with my speech, much more careless with the power of my words. Slowly, that's changing.

I think before I speak now. I'm more discriminating when it comes to lending my voice to certain discussions. My words, and my thoughts, have the power to wound or heal. The same thing is true for everyone. We all carry that power around with us.

So, what you talking about?





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Get It Straight

I'm going to jump right in to this one.

How many of y'all have heard about what's going between the Los Angeles Clippers and Elgin Baylor? For those unaware, Baylor is suing the Clippers owner Donald Sterling and the NBA because he says that he was fired recently because the team's owner discriminates based on race and age.

The reaction to his claims has been pretty standard. People are quickly pooh-poohing the idea that race had anything to do with Baylor's firing. They note that he worked for the team for 22 years, and he only managed to get the team to the playoffs three times. Why stick around so long if your boss is a racist, they ask. Besides, Barack Obama is the president.

*Sigh*

I've argued about the topic until I had raw fingertips. I tried to explain that just because you stay in a bad situation doesn't mean you don't think the situation is bad. And, while I can't argue the fact that Baylor has been pretty bad as a GM, he's been bad for 22 YEARS! If they were going to fire him just for being bad, that should have come long ago. (Also, Baylor was probably the lowest paid GM in the league. In a profession where multi-million dollar contracts were the norm, Baylor made $350,000. That's not chump change, but it's a huge dropoff from his peers.)

The response to this incident has been telling. People are much more focused on finding reasons why Baylor must be lying, than examining why he might be right. After all, Sterling has been sued multiple times for housing discrimination. By the federal government. During the Bush era. Come on, if you were getting sued for discrimination while President Bush was in office, you had to have been fucking up big time.

I'm always shocked at how quickly people try to eliminate race as a possible reason for problems. What's really funny, is how these people quickly claim that anybody willing to consider the possibility that race was a factor, must have an ax to grind and be itching to blame white folks for all their problems.

That's just ridiculous. People are arguing that if I take into account one the most important issues in the history of this country, an issue that has started wars, riots and lynchings, then I must be looking for a white person to blame?

That's that nerve.

I mean, how can anyone who claims to be an intelligent and well-informed member of society not think that race affects pretty much every aspect of American life. Who you date, where you live, what kind of car you drive, how much money you make; all of these things are often affected by your race. That doesn't mean it's the sole determinant, but how many studies have to be done before people finally accept that the United States has never been colorblind? What is it going to take to prove this to people?

Anybody know?



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Mental Overload

The great discussions from the past few days, and an increased workload at home and at work, have prevented me from getting something up so far today.

I'm going to try to get a good post up before the end of the day so y'all can check it out over the weekend and Monday.

Toodles.


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