First and foremost, I'm not one of those black folks who gets a couple of degrees, passes a few tests, and then thinks it's okay to condemn and denigrate the masses of black folks.
I don't launch into diatribes bemoaning the actions of "my people," nor do I get too bent out of shape regarding the typical human excesses that can be found in the black community. While I may complain about rap music "ruining the children" that is done half in jest because as a former voracious consumer of rap music, I know that its reach is limited if parents do their jobs. I say all this because without this disclaimer what I'm about to write might get me branded a lame hater.
I'm puzzled by General Ignorance.
Some of you might be wondering exactly what is "General Ignorance." In the past of I've written about "Arrogant Idiots" and regular readers know I skewer garden-variety ignorance in its myriad forms, but I don't think I've ever discussed "General Ignorance."
General Ignorance is spelling the word "hustle" like "hussle." It's spelling fabulous with an "O" and ludicrous without one. It's status updates on Facebook posted in all caps with cuss words. General Ignorance is embodied by women who think it's acceptable to wear sheer tights with no underwear to the club, and men who are perfectly comfortable with skin tight jeans around their hamstrings.
It's general, and it's ignorant.
I'm not just railing against popular culture and while I may be getting somewhat cranky in my old age, I don't think this is just a sign of me crossing over to the dark side. I refuse to become that type of old man.
I'm honestly just puzzled by these life choices. What goes on in the brain of these types of people? Why is misspelling obvious words cool, or funny? Why is dressing like a cheap prossie "sexy?" I mean, I used to sag, but why wear pants that are too short and too tight? This just seems silly.
And these aren't the only examples of general ignorance that I'm bothered by. Don't forget about racially-themed parties, or dressing up like Klan members and Nazis. Or dropping racial slurs in your everyday conversation like that just makes sense.
Can anybody explain General Ignorance? Is it simply a case of lacking home training, as the old folks would say? Are that many parents failing their children? If that's true, then we need to stop shaking our heads at the young people and start punching old people in the mouths!
Anyway, can y'all think of some examples of general ignorance that astound and puzzle you?
Share
Pay Attention
This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 Unported License.
Friday, May 28, 2010
Wednesday, May 26, 2010
What We See
A certain segment of the literary world is gearing up for the 50th year anniversary of the publishing of Harper Lee's famous novel To Kill a Mockingbird
Like many of you, I read this book as a child. I can't remember if it was part of my own summer reading list, or my brother's. I typically read all the books on my reading list before the first two weeks of summer were finished, then read all of his books. Then I read all of them all over again if they were any good.
When I read that Times article about the novel, along with the 1960s book review that is linked, I was struck, once again, by how differently we all see and experience the world. I was reminded that our worldviews are consistently shaped by our personal experiences and allegiances no matter how objective or unbiased we think ourselves to be.
When I think of "To Kill A Mockingbird" I don't think about the growth of Scout, like some folks, or about the mystery of Boo Radley. I don't think about the quiet dignity of Atticus Finch, or how Jem learned adult lessons.
I think of Tom. The disabled, hard-working black man who was abused and murdered because of prejudice, bigotry and the need to maintain white supremacy. I recognize those other issues, but ultimately my mind is dominated by what happened to Tom; how he suffered and died while the rest of the characters, no matter how venal, saw their lives go on. I haven't read the book in more than a decade, but I can still remember how disturbed I was by the image of Tom riddled with bullets clinging to a prison fence, and his young wife stuck with no husband and a baby to feed.
What springs to my mind when I think about this classic book in ultimately tied to how I view the world. In my world, the other characters and issues of the novel, no matter how central and endearing they were to others, are immaterial when compared to what Tom and his family endured. I really don't care about how Jem, Atticus and Scout saw their lives changed, I just care that Tom saw his life end.
When I was younger, this focus made it impossible for me to read the book more than once or twice because of the intense bitterness that welled up inside of me. I was distraught that everybody else moved on with their lives, lived in the same community and basically continued to live as if a grave injustice had not been done. It was too much for my young spirit to handle, and the reason why I remember specific details about Tom, but very little about everybody else.
But, my reaction is ultimately my reaction. The book inspires different feelings in different folks based on the lives they have lived before and after reading it. What I saw as fairly unimportant, other folks have found to be profoundly interesting. What I see as central, other folks see as important, but not really worth too much investigation. Most folks see "To Kill a Mockingbird" as tale that exposes the complex nature of racial interactions in the Deep South and I don't disagree. The book does that, while at the same time telling a compelling story about children learning what it means to be adults in America.
However, in my world the book is a re-telling of just how far my people have had to come. It relates one "small" injustice that for me exposes the prevalence of the larger injustice that was the daily life of black folks in the South. Tom's story isn't a solitary example of the justice system gone wrong, it's a cautionary tale of endemic problems that persist today. Problems reinforced by dozens of studies examining injustice in the legal system, and hundreds of stories of prisoners wrongly convicted.
Some folks read this book and see a good yarn, and interesting and engrossing story. I see life as it was, and as it still is for far too many people.
What do you see?
Share
Like many of you, I read this book as a child. I can't remember if it was part of my own summer reading list, or my brother's. I typically read all the books on my reading list before the first two weeks of summer were finished, then read all of his books. Then I read all of them all over again if they were any good.
When I read that Times article about the novel, along with the 1960s book review that is linked, I was struck, once again, by how differently we all see and experience the world. I was reminded that our worldviews are consistently shaped by our personal experiences and allegiances no matter how objective or unbiased we think ourselves to be.
When I think of "To Kill A Mockingbird" I don't think about the growth of Scout, like some folks, or about the mystery of Boo Radley. I don't think about the quiet dignity of Atticus Finch, or how Jem learned adult lessons.
I think of Tom. The disabled, hard-working black man who was abused and murdered because of prejudice, bigotry and the need to maintain white supremacy. I recognize those other issues, but ultimately my mind is dominated by what happened to Tom; how he suffered and died while the rest of the characters, no matter how venal, saw their lives go on. I haven't read the book in more than a decade, but I can still remember how disturbed I was by the image of Tom riddled with bullets clinging to a prison fence, and his young wife stuck with no husband and a baby to feed.
What springs to my mind when I think about this classic book in ultimately tied to how I view the world. In my world, the other characters and issues of the novel, no matter how central and endearing they were to others, are immaterial when compared to what Tom and his family endured. I really don't care about how Jem, Atticus and Scout saw their lives changed, I just care that Tom saw his life end.
When I was younger, this focus made it impossible for me to read the book more than once or twice because of the intense bitterness that welled up inside of me. I was distraught that everybody else moved on with their lives, lived in the same community and basically continued to live as if a grave injustice had not been done. It was too much for my young spirit to handle, and the reason why I remember specific details about Tom, but very little about everybody else.
But, my reaction is ultimately my reaction. The book inspires different feelings in different folks based on the lives they have lived before and after reading it. What I saw as fairly unimportant, other folks have found to be profoundly interesting. What I see as central, other folks see as important, but not really worth too much investigation. Most folks see "To Kill a Mockingbird" as tale that exposes the complex nature of racial interactions in the Deep South and I don't disagree. The book does that, while at the same time telling a compelling story about children learning what it means to be adults in America.
However, in my world the book is a re-telling of just how far my people have had to come. It relates one "small" injustice that for me exposes the prevalence of the larger injustice that was the daily life of black folks in the South. Tom's story isn't a solitary example of the justice system gone wrong, it's a cautionary tale of endemic problems that persist today. Problems reinforced by dozens of studies examining injustice in the legal system, and hundreds of stories of prisoners wrongly convicted.
Some folks read this book and see a good yarn, and interesting and engrossing story. I see life as it was, and as it still is for far too many people.
What do you see?
Share
Monday, May 24, 2010
Get Golden
My brother and I had our fair share of squabbles as children.
We weren't constantly fighting like some kids, but we had our moments of sibling strife. At times, those conflicts would even turn violent, although I always found it hard to hit my brother hard enough to truly hurt him because, well, he's my brother.
Inevitably, our brotherly battles would lead to a conversation with our mother. She always hit us with the same line, no matter what we had been fighting about:
I can tell you that as a kid, the Golden Rule seemed pretty ridiculous. It just didn't make sense to go around doing nice things for other folks, or treating them with respect and kindness when far too often they were trying to treat me like crap. The biggest flaw I saw with the Golden Rule was that there was no guarantee that you would be rewarded for doing the right thing, and even as a child I could see how that was a raw deal.
To be honest, I took some of that attitude about the Golden Rule, and my flawed understanding of what it really means, into my marriage. Like many folks, I struggled with the concept of doing what God called me to do for my wife even if I felt like she wasn't holding up her end of the bargain. Hell, who am I kidding, I still struggle with that issue.
But, while thinking on God's plan for marriage recently, I had an epiphany about the Golden Rule. See, I mistakenly believed that if I wanted my wife to do something for me, I had to do that same thing for her. I thought that if I treated her exactly how I would like to be treated I was fulfilling my responsibilities to her and God. But, while it's obvious that the Golden Rule is about reciprocity, I had the whole concept of what reciprocity means all screwed up.
Quite simply, its not about me, it's about you.
Many people in relationships think that if they treat their spouses or significant others the way they themselves would like to be treated, everything is fine. For example, my wife likes to go out, and she craves time alone away from me and the children. It's high on her list of priorities, and I try to give her that opportunity regularly.
In order to reciprocate, my wife is constantly urging me to take some time for myself, to go out to a movie, or hang out with friends. I do this occasionally, but I don't have nearly the same urge that she does to hit the streets. Therefore, when my wife gifts me with free time, it's far more valuable to her than it is to me. She feels she's making a serious sacrifice and providing me with something more valuable than gold, and I'm often thinking "meh."
I told my wife recently that in order for her to truly be following the Golden Rule, she would have to identify what it is in my life that I value as much as she values her free time. Then she would have to work to provide me with that just as I try to provide her with free time. (Of course this didn't go over so well, and my wife kindly pointed out all the ways I fail to adhere to the Golden Rule. But that's another story for another blog.)
I believe this is true for all relationships, and it's really changed the way I look at situations. It's not enough to treat people the way you want to be treated, it's more key to treat them the way THEY want to be treated. More of us need to challenge ourselves to see the world the way the people we claim to love see it. We have to understand what they value, and why they value it.
Once we do that, then we truly appreciate the impact of our actions. We will understand when our gestures are empty and when they have meaning. We have to commit to true sacrifices, not just sacrifices that make us feel like good people. Relationships, particularly marriages, demand that you "become one" with your partner, and you can never do that unless you're pushing yourself to step into the world as they see it. You can't fall back on the shallow mindset that you're a "good person" or "good spouse" because you think you're good. You have to examine what the person you have bonded yourself to thinks of as good and use that as your measuring stick. And they should do the same for you.
Obviously, this is difficult and it can lead to abuse since some folks have unreasonable and unnatural demands. Satisfying those demands would only lead to heartache and pain. We all have to draw the line somewhere and we have to trust our own discretion on where that line should be.
But most of us have a lot of room to grow if we really want to live by the Golden Rule.
We weren't constantly fighting like some kids, but we had our moments of sibling strife. At times, those conflicts would even turn violent, although I always found it hard to hit my brother hard enough to truly hurt him because, well, he's my brother.
Inevitably, our brotherly battles would lead to a conversation with our mother. She always hit us with the same line, no matter what we had been fighting about:
Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.
I can tell you that as a kid, the Golden Rule seemed pretty ridiculous. It just didn't make sense to go around doing nice things for other folks, or treating them with respect and kindness when far too often they were trying to treat me like crap. The biggest flaw I saw with the Golden Rule was that there was no guarantee that you would be rewarded for doing the right thing, and even as a child I could see how that was a raw deal.
To be honest, I took some of that attitude about the Golden Rule, and my flawed understanding of what it really means, into my marriage. Like many folks, I struggled with the concept of doing what God called me to do for my wife even if I felt like she wasn't holding up her end of the bargain. Hell, who am I kidding, I still struggle with that issue.
But, while thinking on God's plan for marriage recently, I had an epiphany about the Golden Rule. See, I mistakenly believed that if I wanted my wife to do something for me, I had to do that same thing for her. I thought that if I treated her exactly how I would like to be treated I was fulfilling my responsibilities to her and God. But, while it's obvious that the Golden Rule is about reciprocity, I had the whole concept of what reciprocity means all screwed up.
Quite simply, its not about me, it's about you.
Many people in relationships think that if they treat their spouses or significant others the way they themselves would like to be treated, everything is fine. For example, my wife likes to go out, and she craves time alone away from me and the children. It's high on her list of priorities, and I try to give her that opportunity regularly.
In order to reciprocate, my wife is constantly urging me to take some time for myself, to go out to a movie, or hang out with friends. I do this occasionally, but I don't have nearly the same urge that she does to hit the streets. Therefore, when my wife gifts me with free time, it's far more valuable to her than it is to me. She feels she's making a serious sacrifice and providing me with something more valuable than gold, and I'm often thinking "meh."
I told my wife recently that in order for her to truly be following the Golden Rule, she would have to identify what it is in my life that I value as much as she values her free time. Then she would have to work to provide me with that just as I try to provide her with free time. (Of course this didn't go over so well, and my wife kindly pointed out all the ways I fail to adhere to the Golden Rule. But that's another story for another blog.)
I believe this is true for all relationships, and it's really changed the way I look at situations. It's not enough to treat people the way you want to be treated, it's more key to treat them the way THEY want to be treated. More of us need to challenge ourselves to see the world the way the people we claim to love see it. We have to understand what they value, and why they value it.
Once we do that, then we truly appreciate the impact of our actions. We will understand when our gestures are empty and when they have meaning. We have to commit to true sacrifices, not just sacrifices that make us feel like good people. Relationships, particularly marriages, demand that you "become one" with your partner, and you can never do that unless you're pushing yourself to step into the world as they see it. You can't fall back on the shallow mindset that you're a "good person" or "good spouse" because you think you're good. You have to examine what the person you have bonded yourself to thinks of as good and use that as your measuring stick. And they should do the same for you.
Obviously, this is difficult and it can lead to abuse since some folks have unreasonable and unnatural demands. Satisfying those demands would only lead to heartache and pain. We all have to draw the line somewhere and we have to trust our own discretion on where that line should be.
But most of us have a lot of room to grow if we really want to live by the Golden Rule.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
